Sunday 31 May 2009

Club Preso!!!

Bemboka cricket club are holding the club Presentation this saturday night
6/6/09 at bembokas most notorious night spot the BEMBOKA HOTEL!!
Kick off is at 4 so be there nice and early and have a couple of cold ones before we start because we all know that its not about who gets a trophy and who doesnt, its about havin celebrating a fantastic year for bemboka cricket and
havin laugh with the boys that u played with in the 08/09 season.

I'm sure u all have plenty of stories to tell!!! i hope to see u all there drinkin and laughin the night away


cya Barney

Monday 30 March 2009

Yearly Awards 08/09'


Best Catch

- theres a few contenders here. McLoskey's Matrix effort at Home, Pez's over the shoulder effort at home, McLoskey again in the GF, Maz in Slips at Merimbula, a few of Barney's down leg, Davo in the Gully off Donnie, Mick W in the gully in the semi, Mcloskeys C&B in the semi, every catch Kenty took,

worst catch


Dunko's almost 'dropped that one' at Bega, the 18 we dropped at Whyndam, Dunko's C&B at Pambula between his elbows(funny how you remember your own f ups), Jimmy's juggle at first slip,

best dig


McLoskey V Kammy, Jimmy v Bega, Jimmy v Whyndam, Jimmy v Pambula, Davo v Merimbula(that tie), Pez's not out v Bega, Maz v Whyndam, Barney v Whyndam, Donnie v Eden
worst dig

- Maz in the GF(can't think of anything worse)

best quote

- 'Kenny suffers from the sun more because he's 4 feet closer to it than everyone else', 'You just concentrate on your catching Dunko- when asked about the Braves this year- right before spilling one himself, 'at least I hit my runs from the middle of the bat' from McLoskey refering to his glorious 4 and out v Whynmdam in the semi,

Worst Quote

'Leave it!' Bretto to Mcloskey running around the boundary at Tathra in the first game. McLoskey didn't leave it and saved 2 runs. ' Not like he's gunna drive you' Dunko to Donnie the ball before he was driven back past him for 4 in the semi. 'he's got nothin' Pez about Jordy who hit 98 against us at home.

best sledge
Jimmy's batting tutorials, KT's personal critiques, Woolley's 'Get Farked'

Worst bit of Kit

the Slazenger Master blaster Bat preferred by Woolley and Motty, McLoskey's cap, Dunko's whites, Pez's Volley's, Bretto's camo cap, Davo's box(bit smelly that), Woolley's Helmet (the white one), Kamaldo's scabs. Editors note- after a barrage of critisism over this award, Jimmys frat boy visor (even if it says Australia on it) has taken the worst bit of it award. Probably for next year as well. He wants to get Bemboka B Grade Champions sun visors for everyone now...

best bit of kit

Maz's bat, McLoskeys bat, any new ball (until Dunko dropped it on the concrete, dirt, road etc),
worst attempted fielding there's been a few...

biggest surprise
Kenty going to Eden for the game at Pambula, Maz batting 40 overs out(and not getting a ton)

worst case of male nudity
the gentlemen at Drake and Jo's post Eden game, Motty anytime after 8pm on a saturday night, Wolley with his shirt off at training, Darth Vader GF night

best puppetry of the penis- mmm. Darth Vader

most beers- Davo/Maz

least beersDunko/

best part time player

Pez hands down. We would have played short if the reluctant cricketer at the start of the year hadn't developed an enthuisasm for the game and done increasingly well in the field, with the bat and not to mention the ball. Stood aside for Bobby and Al in the GF which was a gallant act for someone who I'm sure desperately wanted to play himself. Honorable mention to Foordy with his almost match winning swashbuckle v Marimbula in the tie.

most sociable Mick w, Maz,

Fee dodgers- you know who you are. Please try to throw some money to Drake as The same receipt book will be used next year and it will show you haven't squared up for this year. The club has paid for you already so you owe it to the club and don't be slack please...

Goooooo Bemboka!!!!!

Grand Final day! ver1.0


Hard to get everyone with their finger up at the same time...

Woolley claimed this was no 'white power' salute...

..he also claimed he was just trying to help when he groped Dunko upside down..
..There were reports of this man throwing darts at the Ray Inskip Memorial Shield...

..Which this bloke found quite amusing...
..But not as amusing as when this bloke showed up at the celebrations...

It was the showdown for 08/09 and the Bemboka boys took the trip down to Pambula to front the minor premiers on their home turf. Just a few weeks previous, the Bemboka lads had dominated the Pambula team at the same venue and had some confidence coming in to the decider. With the twin threat of Glen and Southam in the top order, and just about everyone else showing form with the bat at various times during the season, it was without hesitation that we batted first following another genius toss call of tails.

McLoskey and Dunko strode to the crease and Sohaki Charky threw a few down at the stone cottage end. Threw three overs down without Dunko scoring actually, where as at the other end, Mcloskey had play some punishing shots before catching a leading edge just as he was set to explode like a wet dream. The dream soon ended for Dunko too He matched McLoskey's 6 and then was snapped up by a bit of a speccy in the slips off the chucker.

It was time then for the middle order to stand up in the face of the failure of the gun openers. the old saying of score 50 and we win was echoed in Davo and Jimmy's ears by the captain and more than 120 runs later it was realised- Jimmy with anither imperious 80 odd and Davo with 60 odd which really steadied the ship and took the game by the scruff of the neck. The boys played shots everywhere, and played them very well. Mick Boyne was hit out of the attack, Davo played some absolute classic cover drives and Jimmy used his power game to effect. It really was pretty to watch.

Barney was next, and he fell to the evil leg spinner, trying to hit him straight (again), but he won't have to worry about him again next year.

Maz came in to steady the ship and got a nice yorker chucked down at him by SoChucky. Dangerman out too.

Donnie, Bretto and Kamaldo hit valuable late order runs- Motty didn't, but stayed in swinging wildly anyway, and the boys ended with a respectable 239 from the 40 overs.

A quick nervous bite to eat, a quick nervous visit to the loo for some and off we went in to the field, keen not to repeat the looseness we showed against Wyndum that gave them a bit of a sniff in their chase.

And loose the boys were not. A couple of sharp chances in the gully from McLoskey and Dunko, a nice grab from Kamaldo, and a general sharpness that had been there for most of the late season was back for the 200 or so of the Bemboka supporters to behold. In fact it was Maz who topped off his day with probably the only missed chance- only a half chance at that. It did come off the captain's bowling though...

Mick and Donnie bowled well and straight- only offering any runs square of the wicket where some typically B grade shots were played. The only one to really dent the score for Pambula was Wrighty, who was suffering from arthritis, but managed to survive a plumb LB shout, that was adjudged to be going under from the ticketed umpire. At least we survived the two games without any shockers- maybe they save that for A grade...

McLoskey and Motty bowled straight and full- Motty doing more with the ball than a genital acrobat- and there was more of that to come later!

In the end it was the Bemboka boys who wore Pambula boys down- 180odd off their 40 odd overs was the best they could do, and it was a 50 run win for us.

A couple of formalities later and the gravy train departed for the Bemboka Sport and Social club and then onto a party at the showground where the Braves recruited a goalie, some tent sabotaging occurred, some male nudity/bonding took place, some face biting, cake throwing, karoke and a few other shenanagans to wrap up the season. Pez soldiered on as only Pez could emerging from a little power nap in Maz's car to launch himself straight onto the dance floor!

A great win for the lads. A few weeks ago the season really was looking shaky, and we stood up got our heads down and started smashing it. Should be a good night at the preso too, with Bemboka's sister club and mate's from Tathra pulling a wombat out of the hat v Eden and taking the shield. Empty trophy cabinent for Eden then:)

Some astute recruiting for next year- chilli, Wayno etc and Bemboka will be putting it to the A graders.

Goooooooooooooooooo Bemboka!

PS sorry for the tardy blog posts over the last couple of weeks. Hopefully my successors on this virtual newspaper will do better!

We whyn in Windham! part 2


McLoskey had a message for the Windum B Grade team...

So it was McLoskey who took the ball and was keen to make up for his lack of luck with the bat. And make up for it he did. In the end of the day, he'd picked up a bag of 5, closed them down and shut them out and threw away the key. At the other end, it was Dunko trying his best to make up for his first over and his few runs he contributed to the batting total..

We ended up 14 in front and after a pretty serious day of ball chasing, run scoring, sledging the opposition and each other, moaning about blokes who can't keep their arm straight when bowling and holding on for dear life in the back of Maz's car on the way home, we could finally enjoy a quiet beer after the game.

Quiet beers later turned rowdy for the centurion Glen later when he proceeded to ring every pub on the Far South Coast and abuse anyone who had ever played cricket in their life. He was a bit sheepish about his behaviour(comparing himself to Todd Carney the following Monday), but surely worse was to come next week if we were to win!

With Eden grasping a tie from the jaws of victory over at Pambula, the panic to get the Bemboka ground subsided and it was the happy hunting ground of the Pambula Rec for the decider next Saturday.

Best thing was, we could only do better (other than Barney and Jimmy with the bat)!

Bring it on Pambula!

Sunday 22 March 2009

We whyn in Windham!


(above)Pez decided to turn to prayer for a catch to be held..

(above)Jimmy got so cocky he started to bat with one hand...

(above)Barney's eye was so good he started the 'no look' defence...
(above)Despite analysis, the hairy man's action could not be faulted...

(above)In the only sprint race of the day, it was Jimmy by a nose...

Editors note- (abusive)Jimmy worked out that if you click on the pics, you get the bigger version. Just hit the 'back'arrow to get back to the blog...

In
a day that everything, it was the team with everything that went home for the day with a smile on their face from the Bush view Oval at Wundim on the weekend.
A spate of sledging, boundaries, amazing (not) fielding, centurions, 5 wicket hauls and the best clubhouse this side of the SCG all punctuated a warm breezy day in Wyhundim.

Winning the toss (as he does), Dunko quickly elected to bat, looking forward to throwing the bat around with city boy Mcloskey for a few overs. It was more like a few balls, as Mcloskey was deceived by a slower ball which he spooned to cover. Bugger. The big man looked good too, punching the low full toss the ball before straight back past the bowler.

It was then time for Winydhum nominated 'dangerman' Mazza to bring his pink grip to the crease to do battle. A quick short ball which he played manfully into the deck and he realised he was in a contest. He got the same ball the last ball of the following over and hooked for 4 (off the edge over the keeper's head), which showed the short stuff would not work against him. Not for long anyway- he managed to stick one into the air shortly after and was out, which left Winum in a bouyant mood- one of the dangerous O'Reilly brothers had been dismissed!

Not so long after it was the older O'Reilly on his way after a slippery edge from a late cut and a jag of a catch from the old keeper. Jimmy and Barney were left with the 'get 50 and we win' instructions from the departing batsman.

And indeed they did. a 147 run partnership all but broke the back of the Whyn dim team. Temporarily bouyed by the dismissal of the two defined dangermen, the middle order fired like an Ak 47 all about the over, leaving more than one of the onlooking ducks nervous for their safety. With 9 boundaries in 10 scoring shots at one point, Jimmy was at his century scoring best- giving them nawt to give them the impression they might take him out. 88 runs in boundaries speaks for itself really. Great going nig!

Barney was great in his support, getting to his weekly average, then doubling it with some dominating stroke play and planty of easy singles to turn the strike over. Magic in the middle order, and the Windium Shaman/KADAITJA man was no where to be seen.

While this was going on, Bemboka fielding machine, wizard, Enegizer Bunny and general motivational guru (Google Anthony Robbins), Dave Allen was doing his best to gather enough evidence to have one Wyn dum opening bowler thrown out of the game forever for an action worse that Maz's in the nets. Hard to time fast action snaps on a diggy camera eh, Sherlock? He did get some snaps of some pretty ordinary looking shots from the Bemboka batting wizards though:)

The fireworks concluded with 16 off 2 balls from Dinnie, 7 off 3 from Kamaldo and a solid 15 from the tall timber of Kenny T(close relation of Sax maestro Kanny G).

At 261, the boys could be forgiven for thinking they were set up better than the winudm changerooms. Forgiven indeed- it was not our greatest day out in the field- our bowlers were frustrated by our butter fingers as we dropped more than Motty's dropped his shorts in the last 6 weeks! Tim said that if his petrol prices dropped as much as our fielders, he'd be paying us to take it away! Best thing about the whole dropsie thing is that we still won! Catches can win them, but they certainly can also loose matches and we were good enough, despite our bowlers not being at their peak and the frightenly scary short boundaries.

Even scarier was the scrub over the bank to retrieve the ball- apparently Bega lost two of their C graders down there looking for a lost ball. Never found again...

As our frustration rose, so did the confidence of the Wyhudim (what sort of a town name is that anyway?), 'batsmen. So much so that they were keen to point out to the Bemboka fielders how good they were. Mcloskey pointed out that they couldn't hit the ball off the middle, Jimmy-the team's batting tutor was in fine form telling them how their technique could be improved. Corporal Cantankerous (KT) did his best to also tell them they were no good, but didn't go into technique, prefering character assination. You can get away with shit like that when you're 7feet tall and 124kg.

Despite some heads dipping due to our catching, no one was letting off- Mick bowled out 2-27 in another inspired spell. Donnie and Motty were quick and got a wicket each. KT bowled a bit up and down and had 23 catches dropped from his bowling (at last count) and Dunko almost gave them the game with his first over.

But then it was cometh the hour, cometh the man as the bloke they call McLoskey was called to the crease and tossed the ball. The man who is second only to Woolley in terms of Woollyness rubbed the pill a few times, tweaked his field and set about..... (To Be continued)

Bit like a mini series this blog sometimes- but I had to give yu something to read before I go to work;)

Bring on Saturday!

Monday 16 March 2009

oh when the saints!

the iron cordon stood fast yet again on the weekend...

Editors note: Sorry for the delays in updating the blog- Bemboka Home Improvements desperately trying to clear the backlog of work currently...

It was
business as usual on the weekend- Dunko winning the toss, one 50 meaning we had the game wrapped up, our chuckers throwing them down as accurately as A jamie glen tax return and a fine display in the field. 6 in a row now. Hot to trot baby!

It was Maz and Dunko who trotted out to take on the Whyndam throwing attack, and take them on they did. At 69 ( what a great number to joke about), Dunko tickled one behind from their tweaker and walked. At this stage Maz had done the bulk of the scoring, sitting pretty on 15.
Davo came and went- Maz deciding he wanted to be the senior batsman by running him out after they shook hands mid pitch. Maz then had to go on to make enough runs for them both!

And make them he did! After bringing up his first 50 from 392 balls, he looked dangerously close to making it a ton when he opened his shoulders with 4 balls remaining in the innings. Despite pleas from Maz to bowl 15 more overs so he could get from 86 to 100, Whyndam politely declined and 86 no was to be the big man's coup de grace with the bat (for now).
A few of the boys threw some quick scores in the teens (no joke there) and topped the score up to 220. About 93 too many as it turned out...

Bemboka's very own hairy gorilla and Donnie 'pie chucker' Canby took the new pill and with woolley swearing his way though his spell at knob's not being able to put an edge on his hand grenades, and donnie throwing his wry grins down the pitch as he scared the pants off the Whyndam top order..

Motty came on throwing his tight line down before the 'Two Skippies' Kenty and Dunko came on for their fun. Both had Hat Trick Opportunities this week- at this rate there will be 3 bowlers on Hat Trick balls this week in the semi. Unfortunately both lads missed out- not for want of a mighty shout from Dunko (not backed up by his teammates), for an LB that was going over. The old Medium paced leggie almost coming up with the goods:)

The boys again were as one in the field, looking like the Tulgeen Work Crew (now known as Bemboka Home Improvements), but playing like cricketing demons. Mr Helpful, Dave Allen was exposed after the match as having a leather fetish- Bronnie refuses to dress up like Cher, so Davo gets his kicks by fielding and getting his hands on the little red gold nugget at every opportunity. We'll miss him this week, but he'll be there filing a report for Today Tonight and Anna Curen exposing chuckers in the FSCCA B Grade competition. Probably be dressed in camo with a massive zoom lense camera hiding in the whyndam scrub...


In the end, the game finished at 8.45 after we chucked 32 overs down. An early finish really.

All gets serious proper this week- we meet at 11 at the pub to head for the bush and do the job on Whyndam again and give ourselves the best chance of playing on the newly renovated Bemboka CC turf! Bit of pressure on the boys returning from the big city- and Pez who has pushed Davo out this week with his great performances.

Go Bemboka!


Monday 9 March 2009

We do it again and make the finals!

(above)..Woolley Mick said he had a great time in Sydney on the weekend, even if he had to lie to his teammates about being at the Congo...

The boys went into the game v Bega on the weekend knowing a win would all but assure us of some post season action. As it was we did it in a canter, but with a few unexpected twists and turns!

The first would be the woeful attempted runout in the very first over when Bega decided they would try to go one better than last week and make less then 28. Lucky for them the Bemboka ground crack came to their rescue with an A grade bounce (that's my excuse anyway).
Then we had Motty bowling another inspired spell, but with the wickets added in this week!

At the other end, Grumbles Taylor replaced Donnie after another sharp opening spell and weaved magic of his own. In his second over KT found himself on a Hat trick after removing stumps two balls ina row. The field all moved in, and the brash young chap on strike decided attack was the best form of defence, skewering an outside edge to a forward gully position. Captain Adrenaline threw himself to his right, got solid contact with some fingers but couldn't get his grip on it. Would sure have been some celebration after that speccy had it stuck. As it was Kenny vowed to throw one large rock on Dave's roof every day for the next ten years as retrubution (Bible style). Dave finally peeled himself off the turf during the next over to join the Iron Cordon again. Just in time in fact for his gully mate (nothing to do with the Mardi Gras), to get two fingers to a flying edge off Motty's bowling, which would have given him 5.

Ah, the trials of having two retards in the gully...

All up, another magic bowling/fielding performance, with the icing on the cake being PBone/PDog/SnoopCatt/PussyCatt/PezDog/Pezza coming on to take the final wicket of the innings, ripping a stump out and getting the guy he got out to sign it. He's just seen Maz do it a few times this year and thought he'd join in...

Quick early tea Break and back out to the middle, where the boys, being very mindful of their language (there was a pastor of the church on the opposition), Bobby and PChild/PBrain etc set themselves against the firey Bega opening bowlers. Bobby went early though, exposing the tail, but after some grumbling and shuffling it was the huge shadow of Kenneth Regenald Walter Taylor who strode manfully to the wicket, looking to boost his season average of 2.4. And that he did. With PDiddy playing lovely strokes at the other end, KT went about getting those runs quick smart and come the end of the innings he was well and truely unbeaten on 41. Could have made 141 given the time I'm sure.

SnoopdoggyCatt was also unbeaten, this time on 18, his highest ever score! He got another stump and had the whole of the Bega team sign it to take home as a momento. The two regular Bemboka openers looked at each other in disbelief- not knowing where their place in the order might be for the rest of the season.

After all that 2 hours of excitement, it turns out we're in the 4 for good!

Far South Coast Cricket

B Grade One Day Competition

Team

P

W

L

D

Total

Pambula

19

14

4

2

96

Wyndham

19

12

6

2

86

Bemboka

17

11

7

2

**79

Eden

19

11

8

1

78

Merimbula

17

8

8

4

72

Kameruka

17

7

12

1

**56

Tathra

19

6

13

1

53

Bega Angledale

18

2

17

1

*32




Thats right baby! A few weeks ago we decided it was to be see how we go after a forfeit was followed by a loss, but I think we couldn't really have expected the run we've been on.

Sir Jimmy Banabald Glen will be joining us at the athletics field in Bega this Saturday (someone tell Kenty), for Whyndam, who is our best best for opposition in the semi, so lets show them the exit door to defeat too!

Aim to get to the ground for 12 please. Makes it easier to get ready without rushing our asses off.

Go Bemboka